Programming for boys in 2010/updated

Months ago I read an article regarding how the major networks and the cable networks were baffled about programming for boys.  Literally, boys in the 9-14 age group.  Cannot find the article, but I believe it was either in the New York Times or on The Huffington Post that I love to check out each week for fun.


So, I was interested because I have a 9 year old boy, and I did notice that he was getting tired of the shows that showed girls in the lead all the time and if it wasn't that, it was the boys in the show were lame.  Stupid.  The butt of jokes.  Not that I'm complaining, that meant that my son didn't want to watch as much television.  But it still bothered me on some level.  It bothered him too, but sometimes when sick and on the couch, he'd plow through a show complaining how 'lame' it was.


It's nice that we've shown girls how to kick ass and take names, but it's become part of the American Culture almost.  Men and boys are silly, stupid and lame and their only salvation is the smart, witty women and girls in their lives who seem like they really REALLY don't even LIKE these males in their lives.  Now, I'm not saying we should go back to "Leave it to Beaver" type programming, but even a child picks up on the 'stupid boy' programming and gets tired of it.


So, back to the article I read months ago on the new 'boy programming' issue.  I read it with interest and waited to see what the new shows were going to be or what improvements were to come.  These new shows on Disney XD and a few other cartoon/kid programmed channels were actually studying what BOYS wanted in/on their shows.  They were so out of touch with what boys wanted to see on television that they had to do these extensive studies on boys and their interests nowadays.


I didn't hear about any results for a while, but I did notice there were some new shows popping up on Disney XD lately that were focused on boys, so I sat down with my son and watched a few shows to see what they came up with.  Not being a huge fan of Disney programming to begin with (note that with every movie a parent is either dead, dying or the child star is an orphan of some type), I didn't expect too much.  Also note that 'Hannah Montana' and shows like 'Zoey 101' on another channel make me violent.   I can almost deal with 'iCarly' but it's getting old as she ages.  She needs to move on with her music and land a movie deal already.  


The verdict is mixed.  Funny, but mixed.  


Worth your time:  "Zeke and Luther" was up first.  This show commands 758,000 children in it's second season which crowns it the number one program for Disney XD in the all kid centered shows.  This hit show was one of the target shows labeled 'for boys' and for improvements towards our sons last year.


Now, this show has been around for two seasons, and according to my son, he used to say it was 'dumb'.  Watching the second season with him, I find that I actually liked the show and found us both laughing at the same jokes.  The show wasn't that bad.  My son found the references to being a boy and the sarcasm really interesting.  He loved it and I found myself really liking it.


If you go on Disney's website and look up this show and it's talented young actors, you find the tag line that sums up the whole show:  "Skate.  Eat.  Sleep.  Repeat."  That's pretty much what it was all about.  Why I would watch this show without my son is beyond me, but if I had to, it would be worth my time and I would laugh.  A lot.


Tape it if you must.  But you don't need to.:  "I'm in the Band" also on Disney XD was next.  It was weird.  I guess if you were a musician and Disney put you and some writers in a room with a bunch of beer and instruments, this is what you'd come up with.


Girl Warning!  There is a girl in the show - someones girlfriend, was a ditz.  Clueless.  Dumb.  But, in the show's defense, so were the boys and the men in the show too.  Kinda like "Spinal Tap" junior style with no drugs or beer.


What bothered me is why these older musicians were living with a child.  My son watched the two hour premiere with a neighbor for fun and still can't explain it to me.  I'm not sure why the kid is hanging out with this 'band' or why the adult band members like hanging out with a kid, alone, but it's a weird show that I didn't find funny at all.  


My son thought it was 'cool' because they had nice guitars and loud music that would arise just as the dribble that they call a 'script' fell flat.  He still can't tell me what the show is about to this day, but that doesn't seem to matter.  If there's nothing on, he'll watch it.  If it was me, I'd change the channel to the CSpan and compare the boring levels of mind numbing insanity.


IF your kid likes James Bond and you're up for a whole show:  "Aaron Stone" on Disney XD is a more serious live action show for boys that includes a teen boy that is actually a secret CIA type spy with some of his classmates (note, another girl here, but she doesn't save him a lot and isn't AS stupid as most of her Disney counterparts).  


It bores me to tears, but my son likes it occasionally for the special effects and the things that blow up.  I think it's a bit too much drama for a 9 year old, but can see a 14 year old watching it once in a while.  You could call it 'If James Bond had a Son, This is What Would Happen" but there's no romance or scoring around the world for this Bond.  It's Disney for God's sake.  They flirt, but that's about all you see.  The boys fast forward any girl liking boy or boy falling for girl dialogue or ANY kissing, so we never see it.


Cartoon Assault on your brain:  Tired of "The Fairly Odd Parents" or another freaking "Batman Returns" or "Spiderman" cartoon?  This is a fresh cartoon that's cute and more for a 9 year old although I see older kids, including me, really getting into it.  The Disney XD cartoon called "Kick Buttowski - Suburban Daredevil" is a clever little show that's really cute, fast and funny.


There's a small, round cranky boy that thinks he's a daredevil and dresses like one.  All the time.  He's got some type of sidekick/best friend who acts like his conscience and runs interference for him a lot.  It's not bad, but my son reports that the best parts of the show are as follows: the music (more guitars) the flames, fire and special effects - and the theme song which is loud, guitar-y and annoyingly LOUD.  


Hey, it's better than the seizure inducing "Naruto, Shippunden" that I heavily dislike - and am happy that my son is outgrowing the whole "Pokemon," "Bakugan" phase of life.  I am also happy that this cartoon on Disney XD has no tie in products that we know of to purchase.  Save us from crappy tie-ins, please.


The Standard Classic:  Today's standard Classic Cartoon on Disney XD is one of my favorites.  "Phineas and Ferb" - delightful.  Two brothers who invent way cool things that boys would imagine in their minds in real life followed by an annoying older sister who unsuccessfully tries to 'bust' them by squealing to the way too busy for anyone or anything mother.  The gist of this cartoon is that the older sister not only doesn't get her brothers into trouble, but gets herself totally tangled up in problems of her own trying to be such a busy body.


This season, the older sister has a boyfriend and it runs like a crush in the seventh grade where they like each other, but nothing happens.  Ever.  Just as my son starts to zone out with the 'romance' in this cartoon, it switches back to the brothers and some out of this world invention that they are creating and how they save the city, town, friend, etc.


It works for him and I rather like it too.  It's been running for a while on Disney now, and I hope it stays on board for a while.  It's light and frothy and you can truly zone out while laughing with your kid.


The "I'll never see that half hour again" show:  What a waste of production time and money.  "The Suite Life of Zack and Cody" - and you know what I'm talking about as you groan along with me.  Those two twin boys, one a bit chubbier than the other with bowl haircuts and a bit ditzy, stuck on a cruise ship with kids about as clueless as they are.


This amazing nightmare of a show started in 2005 and raked in 4 million viewers - and I bet they were all GIRLS!  I say this with an air of authority being with some pre teen girls who scream and go nuts when these boys show up on ANYTHING.  Don't ask me how it was nominated a few times for an Emmy, but I hate this show.  HATE.  LOATHE.  If you want to torture me, put me in front of THIS SHOW on full blast and I'll do or sign anything for you to make it STOP.


Twins Dylan and Cole Sprouse are the annoying blonde children who run all over the Tipton Hotel and in later episodes, a Cruise Ship - and their poor single mother works in the nightclub as a singer and is NEVER around.   That's not a comedy, that's just sad parenting to me.


The hotel is commanded by a manager who is almost afraid of kids yet snaps at them while kissing the adults' rears most of the show.  The Tipton family has a "Paris Hilton" named "London" who is the only thing with some talent on the show.  She's not just your typical bimbo on the show, but she is allotted a lot of comebacks and zingers that are interesting for the first three times she does them on each show and then it gets old, fast.


I see that these boys are now in their own commercials for kids desserts on the same channel, and that they are becoming young men now, so I'm eagerly awaiting the death of this show and hearing the neighborhood girls scream about a concert movie coming up featuring these bobblehead blonde boys.


My son's opinion?  "Eh."  That's it.  "Eh."  He says the girls are stupid and dress too old and the boys are losers.  He doesn't like it that the mother isn't around stating: "Who is there for them?  This isn't cool."


So, it's a mixed bag - shows tailored to boys interests which mostly are loud guitar riffs, bodily noises, food fights, lame girls, winning contests, clueless parents or non-existent parents and outwitting any adult or teachers with schemes, plots and disastrous plans.


That's what Disney found out that boys like in this age group.  Well, I did my own research and this is what I found:  going outside and playing.


Yeah, so, I came up with my own programming for my son...bike riding outside.  No drama, no loud guitars, no schemes, just real kids having fun under the sun, laughing and learning social skills...and sometimes we add a water gun for good measure.


There!  And it didn't take a panel at Disney to figure it out either.